My First Car

(Or, Am I Really That Small?)

In 1984 I was 18 years old, living in Southern Indiana with my dad. I had only been there for a little over a year. My dad, originally from that region, moved back there shortly after leaving me outside San Diego, to live in a tent.. –He had done this sort of thing before. Before leaving me in San Diego he left me, my brother and friend in Ensenada, Mexico for a few weeks with nothing more than a case of Squirt soda, a small bit of food, two bottles of tequila and forty dollars to get more food…..five miles away, without a car! I was in need of a change and stability and called my mom and step dad if I could move back with them in Massachusetts. In a couple of days I was on a plane to Boston to a life of relative safety and comfort.

I had only been there for a couple of weeks when my step dad got me a job as a security guard at the now defunct Wang Labs, his employer. What could go wrong?

It was an unarmed position. In retrospect this was a good thing for two reasons: 1. It only paid minimum wage (under $5.00 per hour)   2. At that time in my life I had a bit of an anger problem, the kind that does not mix well with firearms. However, I did have a really cool two way radio and a five pound Detex clock. The latter is a precursor to a man purse with absolutely no marsupial qualities. It did have a paper tape with pre-printed times on it. As a security guard I would walk around a certain route where there were little Detex boxes at specific locations with Detex keys in them. I would take the key, insert it in the clock and turn it to make an impression on the paper tape, thus giving them printed proof that I made the rounds and that everything was safe.

My only goals for this job were to stay awake and earn enough money to buy a car. Coffee and the Detex clock ensured that I would stay awake. Borrowing my mom’s 1980 Dodge Aspen kept me on the savings path.

I had worked for three months and was able to save a thousand dollars, more than enough money to buy a car back then. I found a few cars that I could afford, but didn’t like. I found a Pinto. Not wanting to die a fiery death I passed on that gem—another was a sweet late sixty’s Impala that I drove thirty miles to see only to find out it didn’t have an engine. What I bought was a Maroon, 1976, Chevy Cogsworth Vega. It had a five speed, aluminum engine block and an aftermarket forty watt Craig stereo system. (I blew the speakers out the second day I owned the car blasting Black Flag’s My War) Alas, it was to be a short love affair with General Motors Engineers hurried, cocaine and booze filled answer to produce a sports car known as the Vega. Its namesake, the brightest star in the constellation Lyra, didn’t have an effect on this car. 

At the time I thought it was a good car.

The first two weeks I owned the car had a dramatic effect on my weak time management skills. In that time I was late for work at least six times. I had just finished a meeting with my supervisor at the end of my shift, which ended with him giving me my last warning before being fired. So, being the responsible man boy, I went home and did what anyone in my shoes would do: Get ready to go out for the night.

That night I went to a show in or near Boston. I think it was Jerry’s Kids, Gang Green or some band like that. I knew that I would be home late, but working second shift meant that I could sleep until one or two in the afternoon with plenty of time to make it to work at 4.

I got home late as planned, went straight to bed and to sleep. I dreamt of whatever disturbing stuff that eighteen year olds dream of. That night we had an unusual round of thunderstorms that  woke me for only a minute. The transformer behind our house took a hit from a bolt of lightning, knocking out our power and my alarm clock. I do remember hearing an explosion and the later repair crews, but I figured that it was part of my dream and went back to sleep until 4:30pm.

I roll out of bed, head upstairs, start making coffee and hear the front door open. It’s my mom coming home from work. “Early day,” I ask.

“Nope. You not working today?”

Not realizing that she hadn’t come home early I replied, “Getting ready now.”

“Hmm, late start?”

“Why would she ask that?” I thought to myself.

I turned around to look at the only battery operated clock in the house…. 4:45!

“I’m late!”

I rushed downstairs, grabbed the nearest uniform off the floor (the one from the day before, complete with cucumber sauce stains from my Gyro dinner) getting dressed as I ran out the door yelling to my mom, “I may be home early!”

I looked at my watch. It was 4:50. Normally my commute was ten minutes. Of course there is always the traffic issue that plagues Boston and places close to Boston. I could make it there and only be an hour late. Surely my boss would understand and not fire me.

I am flying down the road. My bright and shining star is running great, Henry Rollins is screaming fuzzy nothings over the speakers; I think about love, maybe hate. No, definitely hate. I am thinking about possible excuses for my tardiness, not really paying attention.I am on auto pilot.

I had taken this route on Boston Road in Billerica many times. I coming up to a McDonald’s on my left. I say that the corner is a blind corner, when in actuality it is a pretty straight road at this point. There wasn’t a center turn lane and a few of my friends had accidents that involved rear-ending someone trying to turn left into McDonald’s.

I saw a couple of friends eating outside and yelled a testosterone fueled greeting, “Hey pussies!”

I look forward in just enough time to hit my brakes and suddenly heard the sound of screeching tires (mine) and metal hitting metal at forty five miles an hour. I slammed into the back of a full size Caprice station wagon, wedging my grill and hood underneath his back bumper. I also hit my head on the steering wheel, cutting my head right at my widow’s peak.  

I looked up, sort of dazed and saw the back of the Caprice. It was a rolling billboard for Jesus.

Jesus Loves You!

God Is My Co-Pilot

Let Me Tell You About My Best Friend

In Case Of Rapture, This Car Will Be Unmanned

And so on…

As I collected my thoughts and searched for a cigarette, Uber Christian tapped on my window, “Hey little buddy, you okay?”

First of all, pal, at 5’ 6” and 115lbs, I am not little! And secondly, when did we become friends?

As I got out of my car I noticed that Uber Christian was tall. Like 6’ 3” freakishly tall!

Maybe I am little…..

The conversation that followed was between me, Uber Christian and my friends.

UC: Are you okay?

Me: Yeah, I’m fine.

Friend #1: Hey Charlie, nice driving Mario! Ha!

Me: Shut up douche!

UC: You have a cut on your head (he lays a hand on my head) Father God….

Friend#2: Hey Charlie, doesn’t look like you’re going to burn in Hell now!

Me: Again, shut up douche! (pulling away from Uber Christian) and get your hands off me dick!

UC: In Jesus name, Amen.

This went on for a few more minute, ending with me telling Uber Christian that if he didn’t stop preaching at me I was going to jump up and hit him in the jaw. To which friend #2 yelled, “I don’t think you can jump that high!”

Maybe I am short….

The cops finally showed up, took all our information and called a tow truck. The wrecked shining star became a faded memory of its old self in my mom and step dads back yard, eventually being sold for scrap while I was in the Army fighting the Cold War.

There are a few things I learned from this episode in my life:

1    1.  Vegas aren’t really that cool.

2    2.   A car accident is a good excuse if you are not habitually tardy.

3    3.    I need to pick better friends.

      

      And I may indeed be small.

My First Car

(Or, Am I Really That Small?)

In 1984 I was 18 years old, living in Southern Indiana with my dad. I had only been there for a little over a year. My dad, originally from that region, moved back there shortly after leaving me outside San Diego, to live in a tent.. –He had done this sort of thing before. Before leaving me in San Diego he left me, my brother and friend in Ensenada, Mexico for a few weeks with nothing more than a case of Squirt soda, a small bit of food, two bottles of tequila and forty dollars to get more food…..five miles away, without a car! I was in need of a change and stability and called my mom and step dad if I could move back with them in Massachusetts. In a couple of days I was on a plane to Boston to a life of relative safety and comfort.

I had only been there for a couple of weeks when my step dad got me a job as a security guard at the now defunct Wang Labs, his employer. What could go wrong?

It was an unarmed position. In retrospect this was a good thing for two reasons: 1. It only paid minimum wage (under $5.00 per hour)   2. At that time in my life I had a bit of an anger problem, the kind that does not mix well with firearms. However, I did have a really cool two way radio and a five pound Detex clock. The latter is a precursor to a man purse with absolutely no marsupial qualities. It did have a paper tape with pre-printed times on it. As a security guard I would walk around a certain route where there were little Detex boxes at specific locations with Detex keys in them. I would take the key, insert it in the clock and turn it to make an impression on the paper tape, thus giving them printed proof that I made the rounds and that everything was safe.

My only goals for this job were to stay awake and earn enough money to buy a car. Coffee and the Detex clock ensured that I would stay awake. Borrowing my mom’s 1980 Dodge Aspen kept me on the savings path.

I had worked for three months and was able to save a thousand dollars, more than enough money to buy a car back then. I found a few cars that I could afford, but didn’t like. I found a Pinto. Not wanting to die a fiery death I passed on that gem—another was a sweet late sixty’s Impala that I drove thirty miles to see only to find out it didn’t have an engine. What I bought was a Maroon, 1976, Chevy Cogsworth Vega. It had a five speed, aluminum engine block and an aftermarket forty watt Craig stereo system. (I blew the speakers out the second day I owned the car blasting Black Flag’s My War) Alas, it was to be a short love affair with General Motors Engineers hurried, cocaine and booze filled answer to produce a sports car known as the Vega. Its namesake, the brightest star in the constellation Lyra, didn’t have an effect on this car. 

At the time I thought it was a good car.

The first two weeks I owned the car had a dramatic effect on my weak time management skills. In that time I was late for work at least six times. I had just finished a meeting with my supervisor at the end of my shift, which ended with him giving me my last warning before being fired. So, being the responsible man boy, I went home and did what anyone in my shoes would do: Get ready to go out for the night.

That night I went to a show in or near Boston. I think it was Jerry’s Kids, Gang Green or some band like that. I knew that I would be home late, but working second shift meant that I could sleep until one or two in the afternoon with plenty of time to make it to work at 4.

I got home late as planned, went straight to bed and to sleep. I dreamt of whatever disturbing stuff that eighteen year olds dream of. That night we had an unusual round of thunderstorms that  woke me for only a minute. The transformer behind our house took a hit from a bolt of lightning, knocking out our power and my alarm clock. I do remember hearing an explosion and the later repair crews, but I figured that it was part of my dream and went back to sleep until 4:30pm.

I roll out of bed, head upstairs, start making coffee and hear the front door open. It’s my mom coming home from work. “Early day,” I ask.

“Nope. You not working today?”

Not realizing that she hadn’t come home early I replied, “Getting ready now.”

“Hmm, late start?”

“Why would she ask that?” I thought to myself.

I turned around to look at the only battery operated clock in the house…. 4:45!

“I’m late!”

I rushed downstairs, grabbed the nearest uniform off the floor (the one from the day before, complete with cucumber sauce stains from my Gyro dinner) getting dressed as I ran out the door yelling to my mom, “I may be home early!”

I looked at my watch. It was 4:50. Normally my commute was ten minutes. Of course there is always the traffic issue that plagues Boston and places close to Boston. I could make it there and only be an hour late. Surely my boss would understand and not fire me.

I am flying down the road. My bright and shining star is running great, Henry Rollins is screaming fuzzy nothings over the speakers; I think about love, maybe hate. No, definitely hate. I am thinking about possible excuses for my tardiness, not really paying attention.I am on auto pilot.

I had taken this route on Boston Road in Billerica many times. I coming up to a McDonald’s on my left. I say that the corner is a blind corner, when in actuality it is a pretty straight road at this point. There wasn’t a center turn lane and a few of my friends had accidents that involved rear-ending someone trying to turn left into McDonald’s.

I saw a couple of friends eating outside and yelled a testosterone fueled greeting, “Hey pussies!”

I look forward in just enough time to hit my brakes and suddenly heard the sound of screeching tires (mine) and metal hitting metal at forty five miles an hour. I slammed into the back of a full size Caprice station wagon, wedging my grill and hood underneath his back bumper. I also hit my head on the steering wheel, cutting my head right at my widow’s peak.  

I looked up, sort of dazed and saw the back of the Caprice. It was a rolling billboard for Jesus.

Jesus Loves You!

God Is My Co-Pilot

Let Me Tell You About My Best Friend

In Case Of Rapture, This Car Will Be Unmanned

And so on…

As I collected my thoughts and searched for a cigarette, Uber Christian tapped on my window, “Hey little buddy, you okay?”

First of all, pal, at 5’ 6” and 115lbs, I am not little! And secondly, when did we become friends?

As I got out of my car I noticed that Uber Christian was tall. Like 6’ 3” freakishly tall!

Maybe I am little…..

The conversation that followed was between me, Uber Christian and my friends.

UC: Are you okay?

Me: Yeah, I’m fine.

Friend #1: Hey Charlie, nice driving Mario! Ha!

Me: Shut up douche!

UC: You have a cut on your head (he lays a hand on my head) Father God….

Friend#2: Hey Charlie, doesn’t look like you’re going to burn in Hell now!

Me: Again, shut up douche! (pulling away from Uber Christian) and get your hands off me dick!

UC: In Jesus name, Amen.

This went on for a few more minute, ending with me telling Uber Christian that if he didn’t stop preaching at me I was going to jump up and hit him in the jaw. To which friend #2 yelled, “I don’t think you can jump that high!”

Maybe I am short….

The cops finally showed up, took all our information and called a tow truck. The wrecked shining star became a faded memory of its old self in my mom and step dads back yard, eventually being sold for scrap while I was in the Army fighting the Cold War.

There are a few things I learned from this episode in my life:

1    1.  Vegas aren’t really that cool.

2    2.   A car accident is a good excuse if you are not habitually tardy.

3    3.    I need to pick better friends.

      

      And I may indeed be small.

Sound Bites

sound bites

for

sound minds......

lonely?

sad?

depressed?

at 4am

watching T.V., 

who isn't?

sound bites 

for 

insomniacs.....

can't sleep?

restless?

anxious?

at 4:30 am

watching T.V.,

who isn't?

-Get over it-

-Go to bed-

Sound Bites

sound bites

for

sound minds......

lonely?

sad?

depressed?

at 4am

watching T.V., 

who isn't?

sound bites 

for 

insomniacs.....

can't sleep?

restless?

anxious?

at 4:30 am

watching T.V.,

who isn't?

-Get over it-

-Go to bed-

Republic Reverie

America,

land of contradiction,

land of two distinctions:

corpulent poor, 

Walmart Superstores....

America,

land of the free,

land of greed and luxury,

hidden slums,

homeless bums....

America,

in God you trust,

spurious religious freedom,

master mammon,

covert avarice....

America,

you feed your needs,

the third world bleeds,

patriotic lemmings,

love (or) leave....

Republic Reverie

America,

land of contradiction,

land of two distinctions:

corpulent poor, 

Walmart Superstores....

America,

land of the free,

land of greed and luxury,

hidden slums,

homeless bums....

America,

in God you trust,

spurious religious freedom,

master mammon,

covert avarice....

America,

you feed your needs,

the third world bleeds,

patriotic lemmings,

love (or) leave....

As I watched the State of the Union Address the other day I couldn't help but notice that John Boehner had the most sour face resembling that of a four year old who is not getting their way. A few words of advice for you Mr Boehner:

1. Try a smile once in a while.. You have a look that screams sore loser. 

2. Try and respect the office of the President, and your office for that matter. Nobody likes a sore loser. 

3. Quit trying to undermine the President and actually do something other than complain about the other guy's policy and or leadership. you are not being a very good leader pudding head...

4.  Try shutting up.. My momma used to say, if ya can't say something nice, shut up...

5. Never wear that pink tie again..

Now, with that out of the way, let's get down to business.

"House Speaker John Boehner shot down President Obama’s State of the Union proposal for a minimum wage increase on Wednesday – calling the plan a job killer.

"When you raise the price of employment, guess what happens? You get less of it,” Boehner told reporters Wednesday morning. “At a time when the American people are still asking the question, 'Where are the jobs?' why would we want to make it harder for small employers to hire people?"

Read more:  http://www.nydailynews.com/news/politics/boehner-shoots-minimum-wage-hike-article-1.1263163#ixzz2Kprv1y4L

Like everyone else, I want more money. Poor people want more money too, as do teenagers, recent ex-cons and single parents entering the workforce because their spouse decided to leave after 15 years of marriage leaving them to enter the workforce without any real work skills. The current minimum wage is $7.25 per hour. With the cost of things going up, it is not uncommon for one working for minimum wage to work the better half of an hour for a gallon of milk. The proposed increase to the minimum wage is only a $1.25 per hour increase. Put yourself into a low wage earners shoes and you too can say, "Oh boy! now I can get a couple of cans of tuna!"

Like many politicians, Mr Boehner is woefully out of touch with how the working folk live. My guess, he is worried about having to pay his housekeeper more. Okay, I am not sure if he has a housekeeper, for all I know he farms that out to illegal aliens. 

Taken from the richest.org:

 American politician,businessman and current Speaker of the United States House of Representatives,John Andrew Boehner has a  net worth of $2.7 million as of 2012, dropping from $2.1 million to $1.7 million

It is my guess that John's recent drop in income has him worried who will clean his pool, house or cook his meals. Again, not sure if he has these luxuries, but if I had that much scratch I would, and I would certainly pay them more than $9.00 an hour!

For your stance on this issue, along with many others, and your general nasty disposition I am awarding you with the Political Douche Bag Award.. 

As I watched the State of the Union Address the other day I couldn't help but notice that John Boehner had the most sour face resembling that of a four year old who is not getting their way. A few words of advice for you Mr Boehner:

1. Try a smile once in a while.. You have a look that screams sore loser. 

2. Try and respect the office of the President, and your office for that matter. Nobody likes a sore loser. 

3. Quit trying to undermine the President and actually do something other than complain about the other guy's policy and or leadership. you are not being a very good leader pudding head...

4.  Try shutting up.. My momma used to say, if ya can't say something nice, shut up...

5. Never wear that pink tie again..

Now, with that out of the way, let's get down to business.

"House Speaker John Boehner shot down President Obama’s State of the Union proposal for a minimum wage increase on Wednesday – calling the plan a job killer.

"When you raise the price of employment, guess what happens? You get less of it,” Boehner told reporters Wednesday morning. “At a time when the American people are still asking the question, 'Where are the jobs?' why would we want to make it harder for small employers to hire people?"

Read more:  http://www.nydailynews.com/news/politics/boehner-shoots-minimum-wage-hike-article-1.1263163#ixzz2Kprv1y4L

Like everyone else, I want more money. Poor people want more money too, as do teenagers, recent ex-cons and single parents entering the workforce because their spouse decided to leave after 15 years of marriage leaving them to enter the workforce without any real work skills. The current minimum wage is $7.25 per hour. With the cost of things going up, it is not uncommon for one working for minimum wage to work the better half of an hour for a gallon of milk. The proposed increase to the minimum wage is only a $1.25 per hour increase. Put yourself into a low wage earners shoes and you too can say, "Oh boy! now I can get a couple of cans of tuna!"

Like many politicians, Mr Boehner is woefully out of touch with how the working folk live. My guess, he is worried about having to pay his housekeeper more. Okay, I am not sure if he has a housekeeper, for all I know he farms that out to illegal aliens. 

Taken from the richest.org:

 American politician,businessman and current Speaker of the United States House of Representatives,John Andrew Boehner has a  net worth of $2.7 million as of 2012, dropping from $2.1 million to $1.7 million

It is my guess that John's recent drop in income has him worried who will clean his pool, house or cook his meals. Again, not sure if he has these luxuries, but if I had that much scratch I would, and I would certainly pay them more than $9.00 an hour!

For your stance on this issue, along with many others, and your general nasty disposition I am awarding you with the Political Douche Bag Award.. 

It's quite a juggling act lately between work, writing and I am sure there should be a third thing here since I have never seen anyone juggle two things, but I am not recalling it at this moment. Give me a sentence or two and something should come to mind.

I have been trying to take some time to read what I consider classics.. which consists of anything by Vonnegut or Bukowski and now I find myself with one more ball in the circus act, Hunter Thompson. I am reading a collection of letters, Fear and Loathing in America, right now, and I must say that I feel a bit of a voyeur. Oh well, nothing I can do about it right now. It may be that mutated American inbreeding that makes me want to subscribe to the National Enquirer and follow ambulances to car wrecks on 435 that keeps me reading these letters. Hey! There's my third ball!

So I plug away on this writing gig thing that ensures that I am still in need of a day job. I have actually been writing with pen and paper and will eventually type it out. There is a method to my madness in this, meaning: In typing my written words I am able to edit on the fly. I have eliminated one of very few, if any, edits in hopes of actually having a finished product ready for self publication, or dare I say, an offer of money, a personal jet, assault weapon and microwave popcorn.---I will supply the microwave---

So off I go, for now, to eat, drink a bit of Jamesons, read and write. I will also do whatever menial task my lovely wife asks of me...

It's quite a juggling act lately between work, writing and I am sure there should be a third thing here since I have never seen anyone juggle two things, but I am not recalling it at this moment. Give me a sentence or two and something should come to mind.

I have been trying to take some time to read what I consider classics.. which consists of anything by Vonnegut or Bukowski and now I find myself with one more ball in the circus act, Hunter Thompson. I am reading a collection of letters, Fear and Loathing in America, right now, and I must say that I feel a bit of a voyeur. Oh well, nothing I can do about it right now. It may be that mutated American inbreeding that makes me want to subscribe to the National Enquirer and follow ambulances to car wrecks on 435 that keeps me reading these letters. Hey! There's my third ball!

So I plug away on this writing gig thing that ensures that I am still in need of a day job. I have actually been writing with pen and paper and will eventually type it out. There is a method to my madness in this, meaning: In typing my written words I am able to edit on the fly. I have eliminated one of very few, if any, edits in hopes of actually having a finished product ready for self publication, or dare I say, an offer of money, a personal jet, assault weapon and microwave popcorn.---I will supply the microwave---

So off I go, for now, to eat, drink a bit of Jamesons, read and write. I will also do whatever menial task my lovely wife asks of me...

Parent of the Year

(or, making beer money with dad)

CRACK!

I never saw the old man

move that fast.

I mean, one minute he's 

holding a cue, the next

he's hitting this poor mark
with 18 oz of wood
on the side of the head.

That poor guy didn't see

it coming.

Hell, I didn't see it

coming.

"C'mon, we gotta go,"

I tell my dad as he is grabbing the guys money

off the table.

I pull dad along as stunned,

angry,

rednecks 

start to head our way.

Okay, let me tell you, 

I thought I was dead, 

or at best 

left in a coma

if we didn't leave. 

If he weren't my dad

I would have left him.

I  know any other

hustling,

drunk,

septuagenarian

would have died that night.

I pushed the old man

into the Cordoba,

prayed it would 

start. (it did)

We peeled away, 

no headlights in the 

rear view.

"How much did we make?"

I asked.

"$40.00."

The rest of the ride home

was silent.

All I could think was,

"What kind of parent 

hustles pool with his 

kid?"

Parent of the Year

(or, making beer money with dad)

CRACK!

I never saw the old man

move that fast.

I mean, one minute he's 

holding a cue, the next

he's hitting this poor mark
with 18 oz of wood
on the side of the head.

That poor guy didn't see

it coming.

Hell, I didn't see it

coming.

"C'mon, we gotta go,"

I tell my dad as he is grabbing the guys money

off the table.

I pull dad along as stunned,

angry,

rednecks 

start to head our way.

Okay, let me tell you, 

I thought I was dead, 

or at best 

left in a coma

if we didn't leave. 

If he weren't my dad

I would have left him.

I  know any other

hustling,

drunk,

septuagenarian

would have died that night.

I pushed the old man

into the Cordoba,

prayed it would 

start. (it did)

We peeled away, 

no headlights in the 

rear view.

"How much did we make?"

I asked.

"$40.00."

The rest of the ride home

was silent.

All I could think was,

"What kind of parent 

hustles pool with his 

kid?"

Death of Radio

Flipping through the stations

like a radio telescope 

looking for some distant

alien 

noise.

The alien noise is here!

Wrapped in Taylor Swift,

Mouseketeer teen angst, 

or the next American Idol.

Gone are the days

of walking this way,

slow rides in Kashmir

all the while getting

no satisfaction.

Feeling pretty vacant

I look for a free ride

while everyday 

I write the book.

Oh well, 

Pandora it is....

Death of Radio

Flipping through the stations

like a radio telescope 

looking for some distant

alien 

noise.

The alien noise is here!

Wrapped in Taylor Swift,

Mouseketeer teen angst, 

or the next American Idol.

Gone are the days

of walking this way,

slow rides in Kashmir

all the while getting

no satisfaction.

Feeling pretty vacant

I look for a free ride

while everyday 

I write the book.

Oh well, 

Pandora it is....

Round 2

Round 2

has me stuck in memory, 

re-living, past forgotten,

some sort of

psycho analysis,

repressed memory 

therapy.

All these memories,

living just under the surface, 

little friends,

little demons,

little tormentors

scratching under 

the icy surface

of my frozen soul

that is thawing, 

exposing

what I thought drowned.

Danger Thin Ice!

Poetic self help

of a prophecy 

yet unfulfilled. 

Open wounds of

old

scar 

tissue

never healed,

a plastic surgery, 

a Botox injection

to give, once again

an expressionless face 

to pain re-lived,

"Confront your demons!"

I tell myself

while hoping to 

push aside

and get on with it.

Pain never leaves us,

just goes into hiding

until the day we die.

Round 2

Round 2

has me stuck in memory, 

re-living, past forgotten,

some sort of

psycho analysis,

repressed memory 

therapy.

All these memories,

living just under the surface, 

little friends,

little demons,

little tormentors

scratching under 

the icy surface

of my frozen soul

that is thawing, 

exposing

what I thought drowned.

Danger Thin Ice!

Poetic self help

of a prophecy 

yet unfulfilled. 

Open wounds of

old

scar 

tissue

never healed,

a plastic surgery, 

a Botox injection

to give, once again

an expressionless face 

to pain re-lived,

"Confront your demons!"

I tell myself

while hoping to 

push aside

and get on with it.

Pain never leaves us,

just goes into hiding

until the day we die.

Changing the Theme of This

Hi, I am Chuck.

Hi Chuck.

I am a writer, and blogger. I have been very neglectful in my efforts. I have made some changes. I am going to post more, eat less and focus on literary ambitions that have been long dormant.

Welcome to my mind on code.

I leave you with a poem.

Evening in the Hood

Yelling and screaming
from the house
next door.

Ghetto Bird
flying over,
one eye moving
back and forth,
looking for
a thieving rodent,
no doubt.

Turn up the volume,
close the blinds
and pretend
I am
Somewhere else.

Changing the Theme of This

Hi, I am Chuck.

Hi Chuck.

I am a writer, and blogger. I have been very neglectful in my efforts. I have made some changes. I am going to post more, eat less and focus on literary ambitions that have been long dormant.

Welcome to my mind on code.

I leave you with a poem.

Evening in the Hood

Yelling and screaming
from the house
next door.

Ghetto Bird
flying over,
one eye moving
back and forth,
looking for
a thieving rodent,
no doubt.

Turn up the volume,
close the blinds
and pretend
I am
Somewhere else.

10 Things I Noticed While Shopping at Walmart

It is inevitable, if you are middle class, lower class or no class, you are going to shop at Walmart. Sure, you could be a snob and shop at Target (pronounce tarjay in france) but if you live in the midwest, the south, or if you currently live in or have lived in a trailer park you are forced to shop at the House of Walton. Face it, it's cheap, convenient and dare I say again, cheap.

I will make a confession that I would have denied just minutes ago. I find myself at Walmart many times during the week. This usually involves walking through the store as my wife does the serious shopping. In my boredom I have had time to notice some things about Walmart and marketing outside the obvious tube top and price signs.

Now, keep in mind, I notice lots of things all the time. Most of the time I keep it to myself which explains my laughing out loud (LOL for those under 30) while walking around....anywhere. I am easily amused and people amuse me. I say all that to say that I could keep a running list of observations from Walmart alone. That list would be infinite if I were to add Starbucks, any grocery store and Home Depot. So, to keep this list at a acceptable readable length I have narrowed my list to Walmart (works with the title of this article) and only 10 (again, working with the title)

10. Socks at Walmart come resealable packaging. Do socks have a shelf life that warrants a resealable bag? I am not too sure what to do with the bag. Do I keep it to store my unused socks?

9. Great Value branding of everything. O.K. , most everything. I remember a day when you could find more name brand items at Walmart. Now some marketing genius thinks he has to remind me on every aisle that I am getting a “great value”. To said savant I say this: I am shopping at Walmart because I have a genetic predisposition towards being a tightwad. I would not be at Walmart otherwise.

8.I am pretty sure that all Walmart customers are NASCAR loving, American Chopper watching, Dickies wearing lemmings. This is not by choice, but by suggestion. I am pretty sure that Walmart is paid by the companies for exclusive rights to sell their wares. Think I am nuts? Have you ever seen NASCAR at Target?

7. Am I the only one offended by Pepsi's recent Throwback campaign? They have the audacity to use “Made with Real Sugar” and “Limited Time Only” as selling points. Alas, they will be forced by economics to replace the real sugar with high fructose corn syrup and water from the Ganges.

6. Miley Cyrus has way too much merchandise.

5. The “If this restroom is dirty,” switch doesn't really work. I tested this one day. I flipped the switch and stood by the T.V.'s waiting for someone to show up and clean it. I was there for 20 minutes and nobody showed. I think the switch is still on.

4. All the “Rollback” clothing is the size of a two man tent. This would be cool if I were a hip hop dancer, but I am not. It would be equally cool if I were a size requiring a two man tent sized shirt.

3. There is a lot of rotting fruits and vegetables in places where you wouldn't expect to find rotting fruit and vegetables. One time I noticed fruit flies hovering around a garment rack. “This is odd,” I thought. I looked under the rack and saw a rotting peach with a couple of bites taken out of it. I am still unsure as to when the bites occurred. Thinking about it makes me queasy.

2. No matter what time of day it is there are never more than four cash registers open. This can be overcome if you have a child with you to send over to the bank to get free Dixie cups full of popcorn.

1. All Walmart greeters are robots. They move just like any Disney robot I have ever seen. Don't believe me, go to Disneyland and check out the Lincoln robot. Same mannerisms. I am sure it is on Youtube. Check it out. I have a little test for you. The next time you go to Walmart pay attention to how the greeter greets you. Then walk down the aisle along the end of the registers to the exit/entrance and walk around to the exit/entrance you just went through moments before. Not only will you hear the exact same greeting you will notice by the glazed over expression on the greeters face that they did not remember that you just came through. One day I had some time to kill so I walked the big exit entrance circle twenty times. They are robots I tell you!


There you have it. Like I said, I have many more observations. But I have bored you enough for n

10 Things I Noticed While Shopping at Walmart

It is inevitable, if you are middle class, lower class or no class, you are going to shop at Walmart. Sure, you could be a snob and shop at Target (pronounce tarjay in france) but if you live in the midwest, the south, or if you currently live in or have lived in a trailer park you are forced to shop at the House of Walton. Face it, it's cheap, convenient and dare I say again, cheap.

I will make a confession that I would have denied just minutes ago. I find myself at Walmart many times during the week. This usually involves walking through the store as my wife does the serious shopping. In my boredom I have had time to notice some things about Walmart and marketing outside the obvious tube top and price signs.

Now, keep in mind, I notice lots of things all the time. Most of the time I keep it to myself which explains my laughing out loud (LOL for those under 30) while walking around....anywhere. I am easily amused and people amuse me. I say all that to say that I could keep a running list of observations from Walmart alone. That list would be infinite if I were to add Starbucks, any grocery store and Home Depot. So, to keep this list at a acceptable readable length I have narrowed my list to Walmart (works with the title of this article) and only 10 (again, working with the title)

10. Socks at Walmart come resealable packaging. Do socks have a shelf life that warrants a resealable bag? I am not too sure what to do with the bag. Do I keep it to store my unused socks?

9. Great Value branding of everything. O.K. , most everything. I remember a day when you could find more name brand items at Walmart. Now some marketing genius thinks he has to remind me on every aisle that I am getting a “great value”. To said savant I say this: I am shopping at Walmart because I have a genetic predisposition towards being a tightwad. I would not be at Walmart otherwise.

8.I am pretty sure that all Walmart customers are NASCAR loving, American Chopper watching, Dickies wearing lemmings. This is not by choice, but by suggestion. I am pretty sure that Walmart is paid by the companies for exclusive rights to sell their wares. Think I am nuts? Have you ever seen NASCAR at Target?

7. Am I the only one offended by Pepsi's recent Throwback campaign? They have the audacity to use “Made with Real Sugar” and “Limited Time Only” as selling points. Alas, they will be forced by economics to replace the real sugar with high fructose corn syrup and water from the Ganges.

6. Miley Cyrus has way too much merchandise.

5. The “If this restroom is dirty,” switch doesn't really work. I tested this one day. I flipped the switch and stood by the T.V.'s waiting for someone to show up and clean it. I was there for 20 minutes and nobody showed. I think the switch is still on.

4. All the “Rollback” clothing is the size of a two man tent. This would be cool if I were a hip hop dancer, but I am not. It would be equally cool if I were a size requiring a two man tent sized shirt.

3. There is a lot of rotting fruits and vegetables in places where you wouldn't expect to find rotting fruit and vegetables. One time I noticed fruit flies hovering around a garment rack. “This is odd,” I thought. I looked under the rack and saw a rotting peach with a couple of bites taken out of it. I am still unsure as to when the bites occurred. Thinking about it makes me queasy.

2. No matter what time of day it is there are never more than four cash registers open. This can be overcome if you have a child with you to send over to the bank to get free Dixie cups full of popcorn.

1. All Walmart greeters are robots. They move just like any Disney robot I have ever seen. Don't believe me, go to Disneyland and check out the Lincoln robot. Same mannerisms. I am sure it is on Youtube. Check it out. I have a little test for you. The next time you go to Walmart pay attention to how the greeter greets you. Then walk down the aisle along the end of the registers to the exit/entrance and walk around to the exit/entrance you just went through moments before. Not only will you hear the exact same greeting you will notice by the glazed over expression on the greeters face that they did not remember that you just came through. One day I had some time to kill so I walked the big exit entrance circle twenty times. They are robots I tell you!


There you have it. Like I said, I have many more observations. But I have bored you enough for n