Sunday, February 12, 2006



In 1970, my father left my mother for another woman. I was 4, my brother Andy was 3. Andy does not have any childhood memories of my dad until he was around 10. He unconsciously chose to block it out. I, on the other hand, chose to shut down emotionally. I forgot how to cry. I became bitter. I became apathetic to the world around me. This affected me spiritually as well. I looked at God from a distance, as one not worthy of being loved. As a result of this view, I became reckless.

A few years after the big divorce, I was in a bike accident and knocked myself out. I remember coming to (at least I thought) in a part of the park I hadn’t seen before. I was laying on a picnic table bench, my head on the lap of someone that did not look familiar, but seemed familiar. I remember that this man had a beautiful face. It was unlike any that I had seen before. He had long hair and a light beard. As I lay on his lap he kept telling me that everything was ok, and that I was fine. I looked at the surrounding scenery. It had become quite sunny I thought. It was bright, but not too bright. I felt comfort. This lasted for some time until I found myself feeling sick to my stomach in a doctor’s office. I wanted to go back. I had a concussion, and a very bad headache.

That moment in time was filed into some back file cabinet in my mind.

As time went on, I found compassion for others. I was still reckless. I stumbled my way through church. It was an on again, off again thing for many years. I put myself into situations that should have gotten me killed, but escaped unscathed. At times I felt invincible. I have been in car wrecks, fallen down a very steep hill, taken enough drugs at one time to kill a horse, had alcohol poisoning more than once and lived in the Mexican wilderness for a couple of weeks with little food and few bottles of rum and tequila. (There are more stories of God’s protection that I may share later.) I know that during this time I felt alone physically, but had a slight feeling that I was not alone, that there was someone with me. I know now that it was Jesus.

Some years after I became a Christian, I realized who that man in the park was. It was Jesus. He was right, everything was ok. How could I have missed that? I was so concerned with my situation that I missed the most important thing in the whole of eternity! I missed Jesus. Or did I?

During my downward spiral He was with me, protecting me until I could come to my senses. It had to be a free will thing. When I was there in that park, I was unsure of who I was with. I did not realize it until much later. I think that it was part of His plan to allow me to go through the things I did in order to minister to those in similar situations. I also believe that He allowed it to increase my faith. I have more than a bruised head to be thankful for. I have a lifetime of close calls to look back at and see the hand of God protecting me.

Reflection is a wonderful thing…..

chuck



In 1970, my father left my mother for another woman. I was 4, my brother Andy was 3. Andy does not have any childhood memories of my dad until he was around 10. He unconsciously chose to block it out. I, on the other hand, chose to shut down emotionally. I forgot how to cry. I became bitter. I became apathetic to the world around me. This affected me spiritually as well. I looked at God from a distance, as one not worthy of being loved. As a result of this view, I became reckless.

A few years after the big divorce, I was in a bike accident and knocked myself out. I remember coming to (at least I thought) in a part of the park I hadn’t seen before. I was laying on a picnic table bench, my head on the lap of someone that did not look familiar, but seemed familiar. I remember that this man had a beautiful face. It was unlike any that I had seen before. He had long hair and a light beard. As I lay on his lap he kept telling me that everything was ok, and that I was fine. I looked at the surrounding scenery. It had become quite sunny I thought. It was bright, but not too bright. I felt comfort. This lasted for some time until I found myself feeling sick to my stomach in a doctor’s office. I wanted to go back. I had a concussion, and a very bad headache.

That moment in time was filed into some back file cabinet in my mind.

As time went on, I found compassion for others. I was still reckless. I stumbled my way through church. It was an on again, off again thing for many years. I put myself into situations that should have gotten me killed, but escaped unscathed. At times I felt invincible. I have been in car wrecks, fallen down a very steep hill, taken enough drugs at one time to kill a horse, had alcohol poisoning more than once and lived in the Mexican wilderness for a couple of weeks with little food and few bottles of rum and tequila. (There are more stories of God’s protection that I may share later.) I know that during this time I felt alone physically, but had a slight feeling that I was not alone, that there was someone with me. I know now that it was Jesus.

Some years after I became a Christian, I realized who that man in the park was. It was Jesus. He was right, everything was ok. How could I have missed that? I was so concerned with my situation that I missed the most important thing in the whole of eternity! I missed Jesus. Or did I?

During my downward spiral He was with me, protecting me until I could come to my senses. It had to be a free will thing. When I was there in that park, I was unsure of who I was with. I did not realize it until much later. I think that it was part of His plan to allow me to go through the things I did in order to minister to those in similar situations. I also believe that He allowed it to increase my faith. I have more than a bruised head to be thankful for. I have a lifetime of close calls to look back at and see the hand of God protecting me.

Reflection is a wonderful thing…..

chuck

Wednesday, February 08, 2006

There is some uproar from the Rollling Stones camp over censorship of a few lyrics during the Super Bowl 1/2 time show. Mick and company are lucky that I wasn't part of that decency brigade. I would have saved us all the visual beating of seeing an AARP group flail around a stage like they were in their 20's. I had to fight tossing my bean dip after seeing Micks geriatric mid rif more than once. Low ride pants are a bad choice for anyone in their 60's. Hike them up like the old un's of the past. My advice for Mick, give it up, forget about it (shouldn't be hard to do ) it's in the past, move on to better, more dignified things like being a knight. Go slay a dragon or something.. I mean, really, save us the abuse.

File this one under "Only in Arkansas".
Click the link, read the story of how a woman saved a chicken by administering mouth to beak.

Chuck
There is some uproar from the Rollling Stones camp over censorship of a few lyrics during the Super Bowl 1/2 time show. Mick and company are lucky that I wasn't part of that decency brigade. I would have saved us all the visual beating of seeing an AARP group flail around a stage like they were in their 20's. I had to fight tossing my bean dip after seeing Micks geriatric mid rif more than once. Low ride pants are a bad choice for anyone in their 60's. Hike them up like the old un's of the past. My advice for Mick, give it up, forget about it (shouldn't be hard to do ) it's in the past, move on to better, more dignified things like being a knight. Go slay a dragon or something.. I mean, really, save us the abuse.

File this one under "Only in Arkansas".
Click the link, read the story of how a woman saved a chicken by administering mouth to beak.

Chuck

Thursday, February 02, 2006

Chuck is on a rant again

Check out this article on Costco. I aint no ciphering wiz, but his guys gonna make more in the long run while making a difference in a lot of people's lives.

I have a different world view than most. I don't see the difference between a world leader and a small child living in abject poverty. We are all on the same level. The link to this article will make one think.

I think we have it too good, and forget that we are in the minority when it comes to the rest of the world's population. Being poor in the western world is not like being poor anywhere else. I grew up poor in this country and I do not remember going without food. We had times where we ate the same thing for weeks on end, but we did not starve.

PAPA (people against poverty and apathy) fest is coming up in June. I will make a link so anyone who is interested can check on the progress of the event. I dare you to look at this site and others like it. (like the Jesus Radicals link to the right)

In a recent conversation, I was confronted with my views on our current administration. I was made to feel that I was less Christian(not intentionally) than those who support the Right. My reply to this is pretty to the point, God is not for one political ideology, God is for God.
We end up ralling around a cause, or group and end up forgetting about God. At the end of the day, we have blown a lot wind, but done nothing to make to better(me included). The whole post modern, emergent or whatever stinking name it wants to use, has made a living out of this soap box posturing. So has the religious right.

It comes down to getting into the trenches. Doing the dirty work and, look out, getting dirty.

Now that I am done posing on my soap box, I will step down, kneel and ask for forgivness for my apathy, and pray for the strenght to actually do something..

chuck

Chuck is on a rant again

Check out this article on Costco. I aint no ciphering wiz, but his guys gonna make more in the long run while making a difference in a lot of people's lives.

I have a different world view than most. I don't see the difference between a world leader and a small child living in abject poverty. We are all on the same level. The link to this article will make one think.

I think we have it too good, and forget that we are in the minority when it comes to the rest of the world's population. Being poor in the western world is not like being poor anywhere else. I grew up poor in this country and I do not remember going without food. We had times where we ate the same thing for weeks on end, but we did not starve.

PAPA (people against poverty and apathy) fest is coming up in June. I will make a link so anyone who is interested can check on the progress of the event. I dare you to look at this site and others like it. (like the Jesus Radicals link to the right)

In a recent conversation, I was confronted with my views on our current administration. I was made to feel that I was less Christian(not intentionally) than those who support the Right. My reply to this is pretty to the point, God is not for one political ideology, God is for God.
We end up ralling around a cause, or group and end up forgetting about God. At the end of the day, we have blown a lot wind, but done nothing to make to better(me included). The whole post modern, emergent or whatever stinking name it wants to use, has made a living out of this soap box posturing. So has the religious right.

It comes down to getting into the trenches. Doing the dirty work and, look out, getting dirty.

Now that I am done posing on my soap box, I will step down, kneel and ask for forgivness for my apathy, and pray for the strenght to actually do something..

chuck